Your Daily (HOURLY) Job Alerts
HELLO FUTURE GRADUATE, you have signed up to receive daily job postings from Google/Linkedin/Monster/Glassdoor/Handshake/Indeed/disappointment.
We have decided to email you every hour, though, because our spam is very important to us! To unsubscribe, you can’t!
- The job that you’ve already applied for
- The same job that you still don’t want
- The job you still aren’t qualified for today
- A job not really in the city you put, but close enough
- A job that is the complete opposite of what you asked for, but wow, isn’t that cool
- An internship
- An unpaid internship
- A campus ambassador
- An ad to work for Bite Squad/Uber Eats/Postmates where you can make $300 a day!!!
- Telemarketing
- The perfect job in the best city with a great salary and benefits that you are actually qualified for, but already hired someone and will automatically reject you as soon as you apply
- 19 listings that each require you to make logins on their individual job websites
- A job on campus
- A job in a city you’ve never heard of at a company doing something incredibly boring, but somehow pays six figures
- A job in Columbia, which is sad
- A job working for a shady company that you aren’t sure isn’t just a single weird old man at home, but you will apply for anyway
- A few jobs somewhat similar to what you’re looking for that you wouldn’t have applied for before but now you’re really getting desperate, so you’ll just mass apply for them all anyways
- A job with 5 different rounds of interviews each more unnecessary than the last
- A job that will ghost you after one email, leaving you to wonder where it all went wrong
- A job that looks great, but it’s in your hometown and you don’t want to give up on life this early
