Vineyard Vines announced today that Pez-style roofie dispensers will soon be on sale at select retailers. Reporters were present at the product unveiling earlier this morning to hear comments from a company spokesman:
“After identifying our target market as 18-to-30 year-old undergraduate students who identified as brethren, we decided to hold focus groups to see what new products they would be interested in. This is the result of those tests and I think we have really provided something our consumers will use for their pleasure.”
The dispensers will hold up to six capsules of Rohypnol (commonly known by its street name “roofies”) and will feature personalized monograms with any combination of three letters from Greek alphabet. Supplies are expected to run out quickly, although special requests in the form of bulk orders of the same three letter combination will receive a Vineyard Vines beer bong.
Products are set to hit shelves today at all licensed Vineyard Vines retailers and at the Total Frat Move e-store, just in time for Valentine’s Day. An accessory that will allow the dispenser to be concealed inside the user’s sleeve is currently in the development stage.