Hey, you should come visit, it’s been a long time, man. We can tailgate, go to the game, head to Five Points after and—
Bro, no worries. Just borrow my ID. We look exactly alike. They’ll just think you dyed your hair and have your glasses on or something.
Maybe I’ll ask around. I know some people in my classes that might have a spare.
My girlfriend keeps telling me that Drinking Ticket says SLED will be out, but I don’t think they’ll actually be there.
My old suitemate says you could borrow his Carolina Card for tickets to the game. Fuck, never mind, he has upper-deck.
You do not have a baby face, bro.
My girlfriend’s roommate’s ex-boyfriend said that one time freshman year, he used his actual ID and got into Cotton Gin. I think he might have known the bouncer though.
If you’re for real uncomfortable with going, I heard there’s a house party happening in West Columbia that night. Would that be better? Heads up though, I heard it won’t be lit, it kind of just sounds like a kickback.
My friend says you can borrow his brother’s old ID, but you’d have to do blackface. Is that alright with you?
My girlfriend says she puts on lipstick before she goes out and it makes her look like ten years older. I can have her do makeup on you if you want, deadass, she’s got a gift.
Bro, you look exactly like this girl from my Biology class when she wears her hair back. Her name is Alex, so that could be a guy’s name. No man, you have feminine features, it is not a baby face.
I could text my Accounting Groupme, and ask around?