Guy Without Car Insists He Doesn’t Need a Car to Get Around

In his second year, a USC sophomore is trying to prove that he can and will get around the city without a car just fine.

Scott Neff, a resident of New Jersey, chose not to make the long drive down to South Carolina this year during move in, opting instead to carry a few belongings onto a plane. Neff explained that he “didn’t think it would be worth it.”

Neff said of his car at home, “I have a like-new 1999 Mazda Miata with barely even 250,000 miles on it so I’m actually glad I didn’t bring it here because I don’t want to worry about anyone damaging it. I’m happy my car is safe at home.”

Friends and family of Neff say he has provided a variety of reasons why he doesn’t need the vehicle while at school, including the following:

• “I have two roommates who said they would give me rides if I needed.”
• “I can just Uber where I need to go.”
• “I can ride the buses I guess. I mean, I’d have to figure out how that works but I could.”
• “I can rent Zapp scooters.”
• “I don’t go that many places, just school and Five Points and Target and the liquor store and the park and like sometimes this girl’s house if she’s liked one of my Instagram posts recently.”
• “I can walk places or maybe bike, like I don’t have a bike but I could probably get one.”
• “My friend Garrett said I could borrow his motorcycle basically whenever I want and I’ve never ridden one but I totally could.”
• “Not everyone has a car and they get around just fine, so I’ll just ask them what they do.”
• “I’ve seen trains all around here so I could probably ride that to class somehow right?”

Neff is confident that he won’t run into any trouble, and in fact reports a feeling of superiority over his car-bound peers. “I always hear people complain about parking tickets or meters or a lack of spaces or the cost of the lots,” Neff stated, “I won’t have to worry about that. I won’t ever be late to class because I don’t need to find a parking space!”