Joke: British Exchange Students Imprisoned in Black Hole of Callcott

Did you catch the extremely clever joke there in the title? You probably didn’t, it’s a pretty obscure reference. You have to be super smart to get it.

It’s a play on words. In the eighteenth century, there was a prison in India called the Black Hole of Calcutta where Siraj ud-Daulah, the last Nawab of Bengal, held British and Indian soldiers captive in such horrible conditions that 123 of the 146 prisoners suffocated or died of heat exhaustion. But your puny, dipshit brain was probably too stupid to know that. I bet you’re also too dumb to realize that Calcutta sounds a lot like Callcott, which is a building here on campus. The humor of the joke comes from the fact that “Callcott” is exchanged for “Calcutta” in the name “Black Hole of Calcutta,” implying that the site of the atrocity is in present day Columbia rather than in the Mughal Empire in 1756. But I guess it’s my fault that I expected you Neanderthals to comprehend my brilliance.

You may have noticed that I included a large number of hyperlinks in this article. In case you’re too thick to comprehend what I’m saying, I’m talking about all of those red words that you can click on. I did that because I’m such a magnanimous individual and I thought I’d share some of my infinite wisdom with you. You’re welcome, you buffoon.