New Student Body President Confused That Pastides Still in Office

The new Student Body President,  began his tenure confused to find university president Pastides still in his office. Believing he had won an election for the position of college president, the misguided winner of this year’s student government elections arrived at Pastides’ office with a box of personal effects, asking to be directed to his new desk.

According to one of Pastides’ secretaries, the student body president arrived at the office and insisted to be shown to their new office. Speaking on terms of anonymity, the secretary stated that the college junior became visibly upset and frustrated with each attempt to correct his misunderstanding, insisting that “former President Pastides” be removed immediately so that he could be given the office to which he was democratically elected.

It is reported that as he was being dragged from Pastides’ office by security, the newly-elected student body president screamed that this was “a waste of time.”, that he was resigning from the position of “fake president”, and that his mother would hear about this. At press time sources reported more confusion as the newly-elected Student Treasurer was seen attempting to gain access to the University’s discretionary fund.