Clemson Forfeits Win in Little Known “Color Palette” Technicality

The Clemson University football team was stripped of its recent 56-7 win over USC this week due to a little known technicality regarding uniforms and stadium conditions. The NCAA, with the backing of both the ACC and the SEC, made the announcement Monday, citing Rule 24.9 Section IV, By-law 32 A), which states:

No team shall wear, use, portray, or otherwise disseminate uniforms that are 80% or more orange based, IF said uniform is trimmed with the following colors:

Purple

Violet

Wine Red

Thistle

Mulberry

Royal Purple

Dark Purple

Orchid

Teams violating this statute will automatically forfeit all wins played under said conditions, effective immediately following the game.

The win will be awarded instead to the South Carolina Gamecocks, who’s record is now 7-5, and the Tigers will drop to 10-2, effectively eliminating them from contention for the College Football Playoff.

Confusion over the ruling has abounded through the sports world. Former NCAA referee Marcus Preston explained the reasoning behind the archaic rule, telling Third Spur Sports “The use of this particular combination of colors has been scientifically proven to physiologically damage the human eye. It gives a distinct competitive advantage to the team violating the rule, and if we’re being honest, probably contributed to the outcome of that game in ways we cannot comprehend.”

While officials and fans at Clemson have expressed disappointment over the forfeiture, the NCAA has been publicly adamant in its decision to enforce the punishment.

Mark Emmert, president of the NCAA, publicly released the following statement:

“Who the fuck wears that much orange, and why in God’s name would you ever add purple?”