Study: People Who Talk Loudly are More Likely to be Assholes
A 6-month study has unveiled a correlation between people who are ‘loud-talkers’ and those described as ‘assholes.’
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science
Chem 111 Student Finishing Lab in 20 Minutes Nominated for Nobel Prize
Christopher Halton is an exercise science major, currently unsure about his plans for after his undergraduate studies.
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World Now More Likely to End in Bang Than Whimper
Scientists reiterated the obscenely high chances of the Earth perishing in a fiery explosion.
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Couple Actually Communicates Effectively
A monumental breakthrough occurred this past Friday in inter-sex communication.
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Students Pressure Teacher To Go To Space
After recent announcements of future one-way, manned journeys to Mars, sources say that students in Mrs. Cunningham’s 3rd grade class told her they think “it would be really great” if she went into outer space.
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Gravitational Wave Presentation Interrupted By Local Bullies
Tuesday’s presentation by the Laser Interferometer Gravitational-Wave Observatory on gravitational ripples was hastily interrupted by a gang of local jocks, sources say.
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Scientists Make Scientific Breakthrough In Field
With great excitement, a group of scientists announced a major breakthrough in their field today. “This field will never be the same,” claimed Ludwig Nussenbaum, a scientist.
Read moreStudy Confirms English Classmate Totally Into You
Researchers have released a new study concluding that John Ellis, 20, from American Lit, is 100 % attracted to you.
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