Opinion: You Don’t Really Need To Go To Class Today
There won’t be parking available anyway.
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class
Timeless Struggles of Mankind Not Compelling Enough for Student in History Course
A source has confirmed this week that sophomore Tim Avery is “bored” by the spellbinding journey of humanity.
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Senior Admits to Using Google Maps to Find Way to Class
In a press conference held today, one USC senior finally admitted that he has no fucking clue where his classes are.
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Open Letter to the Guy Currently Sitting in my Unassigned Seat
I’ve sat there all semester and now you take a load off in my goddamn seat, you prick?
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Opinion: We Should Cancel Classes for More than just Meaningless Sports Victories
Alicia attended her 8:05 for the third time this month? Cancel class.
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Student Stops Taking Notes After Missing Previous PowerPoint Slide
Eyewitnesses claim he turned to a nearby student, shrugged and quipped, ‘what can you do?’
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Student “Engineering Pioneer” After Speaking To Female Classmate
Male peers are calling this ‘the greatest advancement an engineer has ever made.’
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Physics Professor Announces Physics “Hard”
In an announcement best described as flabbergasting, Dr. Federico Galvano announced that physics, the scientific study of all matter and energy in the known universe, is “hard.”
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